IN MEMORY OF
LAWRENCE JAMES

miscarried October 19, 1994.
Remembered by Mom:
I loved you so very much when I found out about you. I am so very sorry that I could not be there for you and possibly save your life. You were a special gift to me and even holding you before letting you go was so very special. I am sorry I couldn't be a mother to you but I would have been a good one. Smile. Your brother still feels the pain as much as I do. I don't know some days if I can bear the pain of not having you with me. I know you were a gift from God and sometimes God needs his gifts returned. There is no consolation in the doctor's theory that something was wrong and God couldn't bear to have you live a life like that. He loved you enough not to have you like that. Besides, he knew I would understand. Most of the time I do understand but other days I just can't bear it. Of course, it has gotten easier. I don't sleep with your picture under my pillow every night, just occasionally. However, please don't think that means I love you any less.


 

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